“Gullible’s Travels,” the story from which this book takes its name, has to do with a trip to Palm Beach and was written in 1916. Readers who have never been to Palm Beach and who contemplate going th...

We was playin’ rummy over to Hatch’s, and Hatch must of fell in a bed of four-leaf clovers on his way home the night before, because he plays rummy like he does everything else; but this night I refer...

Accordin’ to some authorities, a person, before they get married, should ought to look up your opponent’s family tree and find out what all her relatives died of. But the way I got it figured out, if ...

I promised the Wife that if anybody ast me what kind of a time did I have at Palm Beach I’d say I had a swell time. And if they ast me who did we meet I’d tell ’em everybody that was worth meetin’. An...

I promised the Wife that if anybody ast me what kind of a time did I have at Palm Beach I’d say I had a swell time. And if they ast me who did we meet I’d tell ’em everybody that was worth meetin’. An...

I thought we was in Venice when we woke up next mornin’, but the porter says it was just Cairo, Illinois. The river’d went crazy and I bet they wasn’t a room without a bath in that old burg. As we set...

We’d wired ahead for rooms at the Alcazar, and when we landed in St. Augustine they was a motorbus from the hotel to meet us at the station. “Southern hospitality,” I says to the Wife, and we was both...

The Poinciana station’s a couple hundred yards from one end o’ the hotel, and that means it’s close to five miles from the clerk’s desk. By the time we’d registered and been gave our key and marathone...

In our mail box the next mornin’ they was a notice that our first week was up and all we owed was one hundred and forty-six dollars and fifty cents. The bill for room and meals was one hundred and nin...

About five o’clock the Wife quieted down and I thought it was safe to talk to her. “I’ve been readin’ in the guide about a pretty river trip,” I says. “We can start from here on the boat tomorrow morn...

The mornin’ we landed in Chicago it was about eight above and a wind was comin’ offen the Lake a mile a minute. But it didn’t feaze us. “Lord!” says the Missus. “Ain’t it grand to be home!” “You said ...

When it comes to makin’ matches I hand it to the women. When it comes to breakin’ ’em leave it to the handsomer sex. The thirteenth o’ June didn’t light on a Friday, but old Tuesday come through in th...

They ain’t no immediate chance o’ you gettin’ ast out to our house to dinner⁠—not w’ile round steak and General Motors is sellin’ at the same price and common dog biscuit’s ten cents a loaf. But you m...

They ain’t no immediate chance o’ you gettin’ ast out to our house to dinner⁠—not w’ile round steak and General Motors is sellin’ at the same price and common dog biscuit’s ten cents a loaf. But you m...

It was a Friday evenin’ about three weeks ago when I come home and found the Wife quaverin’ with excitement. “Who do you think called up?” she ast me. “I got no idear,” I says. “Guess!” says she. So I...

Well, Mrs. Garrett had called up to say that the feed before the game would begin at seven bells; so I and the Missus figured on bein’ on hand at half past six, so as to get acquainted with some of ou...

I can tell you the rest of it in about a minute. The Missus had became resigned and everything was goin’ along smooth till last Tuesday evenin’. They was a new Chaplin show over to the Acme and we was...

If men seen their wives play poker previous to the nuptial bonds they’d be a large fallin’ off in marryin’ and givin’ in marriage. Speakin’ for myself personally, the Missus would still be livin’ in h...

If men seen their wives play poker previous to the nuptial bonds they’d be a large fallin’ off in marryin’ and givin’ in marriage. Speakin’ for myself personally, the Missus would still be livin’ in h...

But I was goin’ to tell you about Harry Quinn. He’s a boy about twenty-three or twenty-four years old and he’s been down to the office about a year and a half. He come there as a bookkeeper at twelve ...

I was hopin’ that, in honor of his weddin’, Harry’d take at least a month off. But no; he was back amongst us in five days. “Hello, there!” I says, shakin’ hands with him. “You didn’t take much of a t...

Well, I didn’t give the plot away to the Missus. I just told her I wanted her to know a young friend o’ mine from the office, and that he was just married, and they didn’t know many people or go round...

I told you a while ago that if men seen their wives play poker before they was married they wouldn’t be married. Well, I believe that even if Mrs. Quinn had showed off her knowledge o’ the game to Har...